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creamy beards

Once upon a time there was a city called Osaka.

In this city lived a man with an idea. His idea would not quite eradicate world poverty or transform the world in a meaningful way, but it would certainly tickle the taste buds of those that dared to try his creamy delights - and there's no suggestion of sexual peccadilloes in that sentence.

The aforementioned man toiled for hours in his creamy kitchen, endeavoring to come up with the perfect recipe for his delectable dessert. Finally, after a lot of wrist-work (with the whisk), the ingredients were set:
2 oz flour
1 egg
10 cc water
1 oz butter
20 cc milk
a little bit of beard

And this was the result....

He had the recipe, he had the product, but new problems presented themselves....

"Now, what should I call my new shop from which to sell my creamy lumps?" he pondered as he stroked his beard and glanced at the photo of his papa, which he kept on his desk. And suddenly the name was born. Beard Papa. And to think, a minute later and it would've been Fart Photocopier.

He was all set. He creamed his creamy concoction by day and night and couldn't wait to get it down the throats and across the faces of man or woman - and there's no suggestion of sexual peccadilloes in that sentence.

Beard Papa's cream puffs do NOT, as this advert suggests, cause lips to swell up.

On a recent sojourn in England, my stubble was tickled to see a Beard Papa on London's Oxford Street, which isn't, incidentally, anywhere near Oxford.

People walking past Beard Papa on Oxford Street.

However, I was alarmed by my fellow English people's lack of interest, for the shop was completely bereft of human inhabitants, rather like Diego Garcia.

Beard Papa, with chairs waiting to be occupied by cream-lovers - and there's no suggestion of sexual peccadilloes in that sentence.

It's quite possible that it's the price that's prohibitive, with a single creamy cream puff coming in at 1 pound 29p ($2.40 / 260yen) - rather shocking when you know that in Japan it only costs 130yen to fill your mouth with one lump of the creamy custard - and there's no suggestion of....oh whatever.....
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On Monday, 25 August, 2008, Blogger Mike said:

No beard papas in Canada, but I have enjoyed it many a time in Nihon.  

On Monday, 25 August, 2008, Anonymous Scotty.VOR said:

As have we all, I'm sure. Alone at night, the lights dimmed, getting hot, Gordon Brown on TV...but I thought we were talking about Beard Papas?

It has to be said though, they are a little pricey. Every time I go in there I get creamed.  

On Monday, 25 August, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said:

Oh wow, did it really start in Osaka?...They had a few stores in Los Angeles, but I never found any in Chicago while I was there. Delicious! ^_^  

On Monday, 25 August, 2008, Anonymous Steebu said:

I'm a bit concerned about the little black specs in the creamy custard! Are they bits of Papa's stubble!?  

On Monday, 25 August, 2008, Blogger Tornadoes28 said:

There is a new Beard Papa in Little Tokyo Los Angeles but it is also usually empty of patrons.  

On Tuesday, 26 August, 2008, Anonymous Gabrielle said:

I was quite excited to see a choux-creme establishment in Oxford Street. I even tried out some of my Japanese on the staff - who turned out to be Korean.

Apparently, Beardy Pops had an affair with Fanny Craddock back in the early seventies and he stole her buns...


On Tuesday, 26 August, 2008, Blogger Laurie said:

It's almost cruel to create such a post when I am bereft of cream! Unfair.

Of course, there's always Krispy Kreme. Are you familiar?  

On Wednesday, 27 August, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said:

That Beard Papa is just around the corner from my office. My (Japanese) wife nagged me for six months to go there and buy her some buns, and I wandered all up and down west Oxford Street trying to find it because she swore blind it was near Selfridges.

There is almost never anyone in there, even though £1.29 is a pretty average cost for a snack pastry in London.  

On Saturday, 30 August, 2008, Blogger Fashion Hayley said:

We have it here in Australia too, but it's always busy here. The staff are Japanese here (well mostly) and yell out "irrase mase" which makes me miss Tokyo every time I hear it.  

On Friday, 05 September, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said:

How come the UK gets a flavor calender and the US doesn't? The closest Bead Papas to me is in NYC.  

On Sunday, 21 September, 2008, Blogger Ed Yee said:

Actually there are two Beard Papa locations in Vancouver Canada now. One of them is a 5 min bus ride from my office ^_^  

On Tuesday, 30 September, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said:

We have a beard papa in Perth, Western australia, opened last year. I was one of the first 50 ppl in the door and i receive a free beard papa pen! Yay :)

We have green tea, azuki, choco flavours here which you don't have in oxford apparently. Hmm. I guess with the large number of ppl interested in japanese stuff here they are catering more towards that. I thought flavours would be the same worldwide.

Interesting to note that beard papa outside of japan is smaller and the shell is crunchy not soft.  

On Tuesday, 11 November, 2008, Anonymous Kamina888 said:

Your article encouraged me to try this place, and I loved it! Though it is expensive (a pack of 5 jam or custard donuts costs 69p from a supermarket) it is about the same as a Krispy Kreme donut.

I guess it will be an occasional treat when I visit London!  

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